you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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