it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
