am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
