some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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