Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
