do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
