This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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