is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
