You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Randomize
