This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
