Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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