did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
