I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
