theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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