so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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