We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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