im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
