I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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