Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
