Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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