For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
