i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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