What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize