i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
