I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
