He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize