1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
