the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
