I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
