Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
