scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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