Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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