Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
