I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
All I want is dick and wine.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
