he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
