I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Need sex. Gaining weight.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
