You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
