so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
