i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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