Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
