I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
