It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
