But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I could fuck to npr.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
