dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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