Sponge bath it is.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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