A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
