Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize