I must be too annoying 4 u.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
