im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
