Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
