I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
