It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize